Are You Taking Yourself Too Seriously?

by Jayne Kopp on April 6, 2011

taking yourself too seriously, take yourself too seriously

Do you have a habit of taking yourself too seriously?

What I mean is do you allow yourself to have fun?

Are you comfortable in your own skin?

Are you OK with the fact that you are not perfect and perhaps make the odd mistake, or do you let things get you down and get your knickers in a knot?

I used to be the queen of taking myself too seriously. :-(

Everything was a big deal. If things at work didn’t go according to what I had envisioned… or if I sent a quote with a typo and discovered it later, or if I my husband snapped at me just out of stress (we worked together)… Oh my Goodness… one would have though I was Chicken Little and the sky was falling!

I can tell you the first time I realized this huge flaw of mine… and I shall! :-)

As some of you may know my ex and I ran an industrial equipment business here in BC.

This business was a huge part of our lives. We were very fortunate to have built it up (it still goes strong today BTW, even though I’m not there!)

I might add, also, I used to take myself so seriously that at one point admitting my indispensability would have been a hard pill to swallow to be honest…

(sorry I digressed)

Anyway… we had so many awesome customers and I had the real pleasure of meeting so many people from all walks of life and learn so much about how other people live.

I used to love simply absorbing and listening to many, many stories about their past experiences! It was such an incredible time of my life too, meeting so many unique and interesting individuals…..

Sorry, I keep digressing…Back to my story:

One day a customer by the name of Randy Thompson came in to buy a weigh scale.

He lived on a farm in a small rural community near our business. He made his living growing Organic Peppers and such.

It’s been six years since I saw him, but I remember his name like it was yesterday. His business was called Oddball Organics. I also remember he was so… Free (it’s the only word I can think of)

I kind of thought to myself…”how does this fellow earn enough to live well?

At the same time though I thought “wow… he seems so full of positive energy. He is so… happy and balanced” …

Even though I do remember a lot… i.e. Names, company names and most stories very clearly… I may have a few teeny details wrong but I’ll do my best to share his, as well as the lesson he taught me:

We started talking… and I think (not sure) that he may have sensed my stress level (I was as busy as all get out AND at the time my marriage was on the blink).

He shared a few details about his life and how he had made the decision (a while back) to completely shift his perspective on everything.

He told me that he and his wife had split a few years ago… a couple of times. He also told me they had two sons.

Tragically both boys fell in a swimming pool. One of them sadly did not make it, and the other one was left with brain damage.

Through this whole horrible experience, he and his wife united once again. They now both only focus on what’s important and of course raising their remaining son and if I remember correctly… they have added a couple of mini members to their family too!

He said this unthinkable experience caused him to give up his high pressure job and he made the personal choice to only focus on what truly mattered.

Now he runs his business growing and selling peppers, pickling them and selling the products of his business.

He loves and appreciates his family, and he also told me that he and his wife have renewed their vows. (I think more than once!)

He told me that we (all humans) take ourselves too seriously… and he had actually written a book about it. It was called “A Journey” and was about searching for life ‘before’ death.

I have it somewhere… I know it’s in a safe spot. I am going to pull it out in short order and re-read it. There is a reason I’m thinking of him today and I feel I can learn even more from reading it again. That’s on my list after this post! ;-)

I do remember that inside the book he had a sketch of a world globe. On that globe he had drawn a dot. Just a ( . ) (Can you see that between the brackets?)

There was an arrow pointing to the dot. The words next to the arrow say “this is YOU!)

I can’t find the words to explain how that tiny sketch affected me

Not only the sketch, but the whole story surrounding his life experiences; and yet he still had such an incredible perspective and set such an immeasurable example.

I could almost still cry when I think of him and tell his story. I wonder how big of a dot he though he made on my life? Maybe I should try to track him down….?

Sometimes we think we are SO important.

We are… but we’re not. (Am I making sense?). Maybe it’s some of the “things” we allow to cling to us that are not.

I guess what I’m trying to get across is that we all need to just ‘chill’. Chill on stupid stuff. Live in the moment, take chances, have fun, pull faces & blow bubbles! :-)

If there’s something you want to do… “Just do it” as Nike says. You are not going to look back on life and think…”boy I’m sure glad I didn’t try X”

If you want to start a business and create a new life for yourself… DO IT… but remember to have fun along the way.

Don’t worry about daft things. Often we worry so much about things, yet less than 8% of what we fear might happen … never does.

It’s all about perspective and just living. Freely!

Take the time to be grateful for what and who you have or have had. If you don’t like something change it.

If you’re not too keen on YOU… change you.

I sure wish I could go back on some things and re-do them. I feel like Cher sometimes and feel like blasting our “If I could turn back time”…

…. I could have saved myself a lot of grief.

On the other hand… I am so blinking GRATEFUL for many things that have come out of what I perceived as negative.

They say that we learn things when we are ready. “They” also say that things happen for a reason. Even Randy Thompson said that. I do believe it’s true.

Not everything is within our control, but to ‘go with it’ and get over yourself is!

If you learn not to take yourself too seriously you will be able to have more fun, and when you have more fun, others around you have more fun too!

My kids will attest to that… they love to say ”When Moms happy, everybody’s happy… but when Mom aint happy, aint nobody happy!” LOL

How true.

Just accept that you are a very powerful human with so much personal power and also the option of making as many changes as you wish.

Make the choice to live well, relax and laugh. If you find your stewing over stupid… give yourself an almighty “gonch pull” to snap yourself out of it. Then get someone to poke you in the eye with a sharp stick!

Now go and have a chuckle and lighten up!

Do you ever find you’re taking yourself too seriously? Care to share? :-) It’s amazing what we learn from each other when we least expect it… just as I learned many life lessons from Randy Thompson. I hope he finds this blog one day… wouldn’t that be neat?

{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

Marty April 6, 2011 at 11:58 pm

I don’t take myself too seriously and it get me into trouble sometimes, especially at work! LOL
You know Jayne that I occasionally post a joke on my blog, just to draw people in. My jokes are frequently deliberately bad. It’s all part of the attraction. If people can sit a watch horror movies, it proves that squirming is something people like to do.
Loved the story/experience you had with the pepper man. These encounters are life changing.

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Jayne Kopp April 10, 2011 at 7:43 pm

Hey Marty, thanks for stopping, as I might have said that I have been a little overwhelmed lately hence my late response to your kind comment.

You know, I love your jokes… I like the fact tht you are comfortable in your own skin.

The encounter with Randy the Organic grower definitely was life changing. He is not actually a friend I know, just someone who entered my life obviously for a reason. I obviously still remember him 6 years + later.

see you soon Marty. Glad you got the ebook sorted.

Jayne

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Steve Nicholas April 6, 2011 at 9:00 pm

Great post, Jayne! I think that it is so important to remember that things that we do mean a lot, but that we have to find a balance. I remember how moving it was toward the end of “An Inconvenient Truth” when Al Gore showed a slide of a picture of Earth from a billion miles away. It was a little blue dot that you could barely see, and he said, “Every human experience, every endeavor, has all taken place on this tiny, blue dot hurtling through space.” It definitely pus things in perspective.

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Jayne Kopp April 6, 2011 at 9:29 pm

Hi Steve, I love your thoughtful comments. You always add something valuable and bring a relevant tid bit to the table. I did not ever hear Al Gores talk… but it sure would help you with a perspective shift. How insightful of him.

Thanks Steve for stopping!

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Rowena Bolo April 6, 2011 at 6:35 pm

Hey Jayne,

I think this can be a blog response to my recent post (on low self-esteem). Thank you for sharing this very moving story. I almost cried reading it (yes, I’m uber emotional). I guess this being emotional stems from the fact that I am very much someone who take myself so seriously. And I know that this is because of the ‘programming’ I had when I was little. Kids are care-free and creative, but once the influences come in (programming), this creativity and care-free spirit are all replaced with ‘negativity’ and ‘unworthiness’ , and similar belittling feelings.

On the other hand when you mentioned the ‘dot’, I am also reminded of a very inspiring Christian video “Indescribable”. Though we are indeed dots in this Universe (galaxy, whatever), Jesus died for us, and he knows the number of each and every strand of our hair. We are indeed dots but God’s love is so great that we should always remember that we are fearfully and wonderfully made.

Jayne, this also coincides with my ultimate goal in life – that is to be confident in Christ. There is so much to be confident for (aka the many blessings we receive). Although people (like me) tend to base confidence on physical things, & outside appearances, in reality confidence in Christ is the confidence we have within, even if we are stripped away of all these outside things. (i may have sidetracked a bit hehe). This post is just so powerful that I can feel my longing for having that “confidence in Christ”. Just like what Randy Thomson shared, we can start by focusing on what truly matters in life =)

Beautiful post, Jayne!

- Rowena

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Jayne Kopp April 6, 2011 at 7:11 pm

Hi Rowena, Im right with you. I totally agree with what you are saying. And yes we are important in the eyes of God… but I don’t think he intended us to be nervous wrecks. That’s why there are so many scriptures telling us to be the opposite. ie: Proverbs 3:5.

All I can say is we are a work in progress are we not? But when it comes down to brass tacks we should try not to worry about things.

Another Verse is Mathew 6:25, Luke 12:22-29 and also Mathew 6:34…. I could go on… and on…. LOL

Do yes, we often know better but don’t follow the right advice!!

Love your new hair by the way! Thanks for the blog post like comment!

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Karlene April 6, 2011 at 6:29 pm

Hi Jayne,
Wow, was this post ever just what I needed today!!! Maybe I was taking things too seriously and then is when the stewing begins!

I like how you shared that your friend focused only the things that mattered. I am going to do that too and eliminate the “stewing” part! lol

What an awful thing for your friend to lose their child!! So sad, I just came back from a funeral of an 11 yr old boy of a very close cousin of mine, so devastating!! Glad to hear your friend and his wife came through on top and I bet they would say their marriage is much stronger because of all the trials they came through! What a beautiful testimony!

Thanks Jayne! I plan to stick around a lot more!:)

Karlene

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Jayne Kopp April 6, 2011 at 9:26 pm

Hi Karlene, love to see you around a bit more!! I’ve missed you :-)

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Its a parents worst nightmare.

Yes I am impressed that Randy and his wife were able to find the strength to see through all the tragedy. It reminds me of my friend Dorothy who I wrote about a while back who lost her husband, daughter and granddaughter all within 2 years.

We have to stay close to our faith and try not to stew. with that said, were are mere little humans… we just have to do the best we can. I think writing these posts helps me focus on my blessings and I like to share them as reminders.

Yes, we plan to keep you around as long as possible too!

Thanks for dropping in!

Jayne

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