Positive Life Changes | What’s Stopping You From Starting an Online Business?

by Jayne Kopp on April 21, 2011

life changes, starting online business, what's holding you back

watching from the sidelines...

Most of us have a desire to make positive life changes and as you may have noticed I’m on the roll on this topic if you read my previous post “Will Starting an Online Business Change Your Life?”

I state this with confidence, not because I am the sharpest knife in the drawer, (I’m not), :-) but simply due to the sheer number of people I speak to about making positive changes and starting an online business in my industry.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned is that we all have needs, dreams, goals and things we would change in order to reach that point of complete satisfaction… (Or at least what we perceive as total satisfaction) in our own minds.

What boggles my mind the most about this is, that many people WANT to create positive change in life, they want to break into this online business industry, but there are too many fears, or excuses getting in the way of just stepping out and doing something about it.

I’m planning a series on “fears” in the very near future but at the moment I’m busy compiling notes from all the many people who have either partnered with me or disappeared for ever. I’d like to share the differences in mindset…. so please stay tuned for that. ;-)

In the meantime I am very interested to hear your take on why you have “thought” about making life changes and starting an online business… but haven’t yet taken the steps. (so after you finish reading this post and have let it sink in… please feel free to “let it all” out in a comment below!) :-)

For now, until you shed some possible light, I will share a few of my beliefs surrounding the subject … but I’ll also toss out a few questions… and answers… in order to give you a few things to think about!

What I’m really hoping to do is give you the encouragement (or push) to step out and start working towards what ever it really is that you want to do.

Why you may not be making life changes:

I honestly feel that many people think that creating a business (offline business or online business) is for ‘other people’…or perhaps in your mind “other smarter people”.

* In other words could it be possible that because you have never stepped out of your comfort zone, and that you have “subconsciously” chosen to leave entrepreneurship to those who have?

*Do you find it easier to exclude yourself from this category of individuals, and find it safer to sit on the sidelines and watch instead?

I speak to so many people who have toyed around with the ‘fantasy’ of stepping out and doing something, but never have because they haven’t considered their own possibilities and the benefits that could be enjoyed as a result.

I’m not sure if it’s a self worth or self image issue combined with lack of confidence or what…. but I do know it’s a shame. :-(

I’ve already told you that I am not the one of the brightest bulbs in the box, but at least I had the openness and saw no harm in at least making the move to do what I felt I needed or wanted to start my online business, in order to also create the changes in life I craved.

Now in fairness, this post really isn’t about me… and perhaps this post shouldn’t all be about making life changes solely connected to starting a business either, but since the vast majority of people I speak to have some sort of financial need… and want to create a positive change in life, its something I know a lot about.

Not to mention that of course being that I am in the industry of helping and coaching entrepreneurs develop their skill online, it is very near and dear to my heart.

The harsh reality is though, that this type of mindset mentioned above is rampant in many other areas of life as well.

For example: I have a friend who loves to ‘watch’ ice skating. She watches any ice skating or figure skating show on TV that she claps her eyes upon!

She visits the local community center to work out often, and during the skating season when the ice is actually on the rink, she will stop by and “watch” the instructors teach people how to skate.

The problem is (and notice I call it a problem)… she had never been on a pair of skates!

I’ve said to her on many occasions…”why don’t you take lessons and learn to skate?”

Her response: “oh… ya know… I’ll just leave it to those who do it well and I’m probably a better observer than I would be a skater…” and she laughed it off.

Talk about getting my knickers in a twist… I mean, how would you EVER know if you don’t try??? :-|

To me, this is the poster child example of a loosy goosy attitude. I mean, if you really want to do something and it’s on your mind… then why not?

Now for a few other thoughts and questions from my landmine of honesty (as promised LOL)… whether you want them or not!

* Ask yourself: …”How badly do I want to make changes?”

* If you really have a burning desire to do something… why not do it?

* If fulfilling your desire would create a positive change in your life… ask yourself: “what is really holding me back?”

* I’m sure you’ll agree that life is short… much too short to be honest, and if you were to drop dead tomorrow, (heaven forbid) would you look back on life and be glad you hadn’t done what you NOW have the ability to do while you are here?

Didn’t think so….! ;-)

Another question would be: “Is it harmless?” Or “will this hurt anybody?”

Let’s face it, starting an internet business in order to improve and learn how to continue to make life changes is certainly nothing short of beneficial, just the same as learning to skate is completely harmless, and yet could add so much joy.

* How do you think you’d feel if you just decided to step outside your own dotted line and DO what it is you want to do?

* Do you think the benefits would or could far outweigh the negatives?

* Don’t you think there would be a sense of relief and/or excitement by doing something for you?

* Would it add a sense of pride and satisfaction because you are now doing something you’ve thought about for so long?

* Are you not worth the happiness and joy that just might lie ahead if you stepped aside and got the heck out of your own way?

* Who’s it hurting?

In my opinion you are hurting yourself by holding YOU back, just as my friend is/was by not quenching that insatiable desire to skate…

I’m not saying be daft… (Just use common sense). What I am saying is that if you really want to do something like start an online business in order to create positive life changes, then why not grab life by the short hairs and just do it? (???)

You’ve got more to lose by not moving forward than your would by trying your hand at something.

Besides, it’s been my experience that people only get what they want and live life to the fullest, when they actually do something to make life changes.

Solely “thinking” about it will continue to drive you crazy and leave you wondering FOR EVER, if you should have.

As time passes and we age, we often look back and wish we had tried something that would or could have held many promises to making positive life changes.

Unfortunately however, sometimes we feel it’s too late and realize we’ve missed the boat or that it has just sailed out of the harbour and we’re not on it.

It’s a terrible waste of life to be honest, and terribly disappointing.

Now on a positive note: My friend finally… ((Thank goodness))… caved to my continual encouragement (or hounding) and has started to take skating lessons. :-)

Like many new business owners, as a new skater… she has suffered a few bumps and bruises and landed on her bottom more than once.

The thing is though, she always gets back up and brushes herself off and does it again.

Now she’s skating without a safety bar… and her skating sessions are all she can think about…and all she looks forward to. (Sometimes I wish I had duct tape!) :-)

You know what she says to me when she calls me after her lessons?

She’s said more than once “why didn’t you get me to do this sooner?…look at all the time I’ve wasted fantasizing… it’s the best thing I did for myself!”

Oh (groan!) …no comment necessary! :-|

Can you relate or see yourself in my examples? Has it given you something to think about?

If you truly want to start an online business, ask yourself: “am I worth it?”

Then weigh the pros and cons of staying right where you are … opposed to satisfying your dreams and the possibility of creating positive life changes and your own economy.

If you need help or would like a free coaching session to take the steps towards making life changes, pick up the phone or contact me to get your questions answered and let’s get your show on the road!

What are you waiting for?

{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }

Atwine August 5, 2011 at 10:08 am

Hey,
Recently I have begun a blog, I am not the sharpest either but I have given it a shot and frankly its going better than I thought. I am still growing. Its that some of the friends I have tried to invite are frozen in fear and are not up to taking a step and seeing what could happen.
Thank you for your time. It was well spent.

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Tosin@Home-Based Business Coach April 27, 2011 at 7:57 am

Hey Jayne,

It’s a pity that instead of finding just one reason to do what needs to be done, we always find a thousand and one reasons why we cannot do what we should do.

Personal development can not be taken out of growing a home-based business because it is vitally important that the mind be in sync with what is happening around us.

Now we have a few people who can take action whether tere are people there or not, but for most of us, we need those people around us who can urge us on, who can believe in us to do to, who can hold us accountable to our actions and in turn be genuinely happy for our victories.

If we strive to be such people, we will see more people go out of their comfort zone, just like your friend, and do the things the most fear.

Thanks for sharing your insights with us, Jayne!

Tosin

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Jayne Kopp April 27, 2011 at 10:33 am

HI Tosin, thanks for coming. Lovely to see you.

You are so right. Stepping out of your comfort zone as my friend did pays dividends in the end. I also agree that having people to cheer us on or push us is incredibly beneficial.

btw – if you visited my site earlier and it had HUGE font, it was an issue with a Wordpress Plug in. It’s fixed now, but sorry for the appearance!

Best,

Jayne

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Joyce Oladipo April 27, 2011 at 6:30 am

Great and inspiring post.

I have always wanted to work for myself but the fear of not being good enough as always hold my back then one day after the birth of my first child i decided to give it a shot. It is the best decision i have ever made.

We need to be willing to take risk and follow our dreams not a lot of people are doing that. Since have started my journey online have a lot of people and have touched so many lives.

Thanks for sharing

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Jayne Kopp April 27, 2011 at 11:21 am

Joyce, I agree with both of those ‘fears’… fear of failure is a biggy, but also the uncertainty of legitimacy is also a little unsettling.

I think though that taking chances combined with a healthy dose of common sense is what needs to be done in order to create any change.

Life is full of opportunity, but we need sometimes to just go for it and not let the fear of being taken to the cleaners hold us up.

Due diligence is the name of the game with anything worth doing in life.

Thanks for adding value to this post.

btw – if you visited my site earlier and it had HUGE font, it was an issue with a Wordpress Plug in. It’s fixed now, but sorry for the appearance!

Talk to you soon!

Jayne

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Dr. Bob Clarke April 25, 2011 at 2:11 pm

Hi Jayne,

What a thoughtful, insightful and encouraging call for change! I love this post and will definitely share it with all my social media buddies. :-)

From the people I’ve spoken to during my years in Network Marketing, it seems like FEAR is the biggest obstacle for them to overcome. Fear of failure, to be sure….. but also a fear of getting “taken”.

You know there’s so much hype and so many promises being made out there that it makes it hard to separate fact from reality, even for me. I can’t imagine what it must be like for the person trying to make the decision to start or not.

Thanks so much for your inspiration and leadership.

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Jayne Kopp April 25, 2011 at 5:16 pm

HI Dr. Bob, Please accept my apologies again for not responding sooner. Easter has been a busy time for us!

I do believe you are right saying that ‘fear’ is a biggy. I think it’s the fear of many things though. Fear or the unknown, fear of failure, fear of success… fear of responsibility, fear of discipline… all rolled into a ball!

Thanks for your kind words, I appreciate you sharing! :-)

see you soon

Jayne

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Jayne Kopp April 27, 2011 at 10:36 am

Joyce, I agree with both of those ‘fears’… fear of failure is a biggy, but also the uncertainty of legitimacy is also a little unsettling.

I think though that taking chances combined with a healthy dose of common sense is what needs to be done in order to create any change.

Life is full of opportunity, but we need sometimes to just go for it and not let the fear of being taken to the cleaners hold us up.

Due diligence is the name of the game with anything worth doing in life.

Thanks for adding value to this post.

btw – if you visited my site earlier and it had HUGE font, it was an issue with a Wordpress Plug in. It’s fixed now, but sorry for the appearance!

Talk to you soon!

Jayne

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Jon April 24, 2011 at 7:50 pm

Hi Jayne,

“You’ve got more to lose by not moving forward than your would by trying your hand at something.” Amen!

Jayne, spectacular post. You know I have been in a daze all day but your post has helped perk me up. I enjoy this topic and you’ve explored it deeply.

We have to learn to get a handle on our fears and self-limiting beliefs and thoughts. It’s amazing how empowered we become just by taking that first step of action toward our goals.

You have such funny little sayings and wit sprinkled in your articles :)

Thanks!

Jon

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Jayne Kopp April 24, 2011 at 8:18 pm

HI Jon, lovely to see your smiling face. :-) Yes we do have a lot to lose by not moving forward, even if it’s solely the experience itself.

as you can tell, it drives me nuts to see people hesitate, but as you say it has to be fears and limiting beliefs… but it does make a difference when we just go for it.

Thanks for stopping by Jon.

Jayne

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Samantha Bangayan April 24, 2011 at 3:58 pm

What a motivational post, Jayne! I am definitely tweeting this because I think a lot of people need this extra push in the right direction. =)

You had me reflecting on my own experience starting an online business and I think the key moment was when I moved to Peru. Stepping way out of my comfort zone allowed me to imagine all the possibilities in an entirely new world. I built the confidence to try more and more new things, and my life has been all the more fulfilling for it. =)

But what really hit me in your post was the story of your friend. It made me realize that I was still in a similar situation. I’ve always admired gymnasts and some friends here have invited me to join their practice sessions, but I’ve always been on the sidelines, admiring and dreaming. =P I’m going to get in there and try it, Jayne, because you’re so right that life is short. =)

Thank you for this beautiful and encouraging post! =)

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Jayne Kopp April 24, 2011 at 6:11 pm

Hey Samantha… absolutely you should just do it. why not. What is the worst that can happen? Perhaps you don’t like it as much as you thought? I am sure it will be nothing less than positive. Life is much too short. I always fear that life is often shorter than we wish for… so we must do the things we can while we are here.

Go for it girlie… I would like a full report!

best

Jayne

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Janet @ The Natural Networker April 24, 2011 at 1:29 pm

Jayne, aloha. It would have been so nice had you told us how your really felt! Seriously, this is a terrific post and, hopefully, will get some people of their okoles and moving forward.

Using your friend who had long admired skaters and was a “watcher’ only was a perfect illustration. We do have to get out there, do it, fall down, pick ourselves off, dust ourselves off and start all over again.

Jayne, since I thrive on change and starting new things, I so appreciate what you said in this post. It could well be just the wake up call so folks need.

If you had only told them, Jayne, how much they would enjoy having a homes based business and all the benefits, well then, they would have started one long ago.

Way to go, Jayne. Best wishes for a terrific week. Aloha. Janet

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Jayne Kopp April 24, 2011 at 6:13 pm

LOL Janet… Aloha! Yes I suppose I could have done a better job at sharing my feelings! LOL

I think that having a home based business is awesome. Maybe I will write a post on all the benefits I derive from mind. Great suggestion Janet. I hope Easter is enjoyable for you. (If you celebrate).

Best

Jayne

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Jane | Blogging Tips April 24, 2011 at 8:48 am

Hi Jayne,

It used to be my lack of confidence, which stopped me from bringing in changes. And lack of confidence leads to all sorts of fear you point out.

But it took me a long to time to figure out the culprit. Once I found that it is just the lack of confidence, it helped me after that to make bolder moves. The point was to just be aware of what was stopping me.

And about your friend who watches skating, I simply can’t resist in doing that by myself if I am interested in watching it. That’s how I started blogging, by the way.

Cheers,
Jane.

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Marcus Baker April 23, 2011 at 8:23 pm

Hi Jayne,

I could feel your passion “ooze” (in the nicest possible way of course) through your words in this post! :)

What I have come to understand about why people do or don’t do something is simply a matter of whether they feel ready to take a leap of faith regardless.

To do this people have to have a big enough WHY for doing it and they have to have felt the pain that will come from not doing so.

Often people only move when their pain is real enough rather than try and prevent this suffering by anticipating how bad it will be and taking action beforehand.

The problem with this is that when we make a move because we are already suffering, then we do so out of desperation and that just constricts our energy flow which in the end end thwarts our attempts to rescue ourselves.

We are far better off looking at what we have, deciding we don’t like it and having the vision to feel how it will feel to be in the same situation in the future.

Then with the help of motivating posts like this, hopefully make a decision to love ourselves more and act on that.

Whatever happens we are all on personal journeys and as long as we never give up we have to expand towards realizing the fullness of who we are.

Thanks for a though provoking read!

~Marcus

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Jayne Kopp April 24, 2011 at 6:18 pm

Hey Marcus… I am so relieved that I at least Ooze nicely! (Phew)

I am so passionate about this.. I just can’t get my head around people not doing what they want to do. sometimes I wonder though if some are not as thick as two short planks? I mean to just accept being stuck just doesn’t compute with me.

I understand that for some the penny drops when at the point of desperation. I wonder though why some don’t see the abundance of opportunity?

I wonder what they are afraid of? I guess we are all different as you say… and this journey is personal. It still makes me steam though. (or should that be ooze?)…

LOL

thanks for stopping Marcus!

Jayne

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Jeanine Byers Hoag @DressingMyTruth April 23, 2011 at 3:23 pm

I think fear, low self-esteem and/or limiting beliefs have been the things that have stopped me in the past from taking risks!

If you don’t try, you can’t fail. Or embarrass yourself.

Once you decide it’s worth it and you’re worth it, then the possibility of failure or embarrassment are not so scary.

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Jayne Kopp April 24, 2011 at 6:21 pm

Hi Jeanine, I have to agree that fear and low self esteem just be at the crux of the reasons why many don’t act on desires.

Is it not funny though who a mindset change ie: deciding you are worth it, or ‘it’s worth it can put a completely different spin on things and really the only change has been between our ears?

Lovely to see you my well dressed friend. will be over to see you shortly. I hope your Easter is going well.

Jayne

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Christian Hollingsworth April 23, 2011 at 11:42 am

Life is so very short. Life is life. Blogging isn’t life. Our businesses aren’t life, but they DO in fact allow us more freedom to pursue more of our passions and hobbies.

We all tend to go through life at times carrying burdens, weight and pain. We want other things in our lives. We don’t like the direction we’re headed. We’re unhappy. We lack motivation. We all go through these waves.

What am I waiting for? Often it’s myself. I’m waiting for myself to get up. Waiting for myself to start dreaming, become better and rise to the challenge. I just need to find a way to kick myself in my own pants and get to work!

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Jayne Kopp April 25, 2011 at 5:20 pm

HI Christian, please accept my apologies for not getting to this sooner… Easter has a way of filling the days, especially with children.

You are right, we do all go through waves. Blogging and business is not life, but the thing is blogging and business can make life better and reduce the number of waves we have! (meaning ups and downs… with emphasis on the downs!)

Yes … sometimes we do need to kick ourselves in the Ar$e and get the show on the road. Life is full of possibility if we just take it by the short hairs and experience. So many doors open. It sure beats being a bump on a log!

Lovely to meet you. Please pop back! I’ll head over to yours in a while…. just have to catch up on comments… I can’t resist your post title! :-)

Jayne

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Justin | Mazzastick April 22, 2011 at 8:32 pm

Jayne,

I have noticed that there are more blogs that are mixing personal development with business. Yes they go hand in hand so why not combine the two.

Ever since I started my blog I have been recruiting others to do it as well. All of them have some kind of excuse for not wanting to try it. I even offered to help them set it up with out them having to learn everything on their own.

I guess they like where they are enough to not want to try something new. Oh well.

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Jayne Kopp April 25, 2011 at 5:24 pm

Hi Justin, how lovely to meet you. I apologize for not getting back to you sooner, Easter seemed to really get a grip on my life this weekend. Been busy with the kids, etc.

Regarding personal development… I think it’s fairly obvious that it’s a huge part of my primary online presence. The thing is though that personal development is necessary for anything we do in life, so as far as I am concerned a good dose of self growth never hurt anyone and can only enhance the mindset.

I agree that not everyone is willing to make the sacrifice to make changes. Those are the ones who we have to let go. I never get attached to the outcome with the people who approach me. If they truly want to get involved, they will. If they want it done for them… I can’t help them.

It can be a tough pill to swallow at first… but as you say “oh well”

Lovely to meet you Justin. Please pop back.

I will pop over and visit you soon.

Jayne

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